Theater of Sorrows

Words

My words are gone
I like to think that they are spread among the stars
That in that celestial universe of wondrous beauty
They too are beautiful –
No matter how tragic their meaning
And although a falling star ceases to exist
It leaves a stardust trail; Shimmering, silvery energy –
An eternal link to the unknown before
And the unknown after –
As I hope my words will do
I gave you my words
Spilling from my cautious soul in freefall…
Luminous, lovely exclamations in awe of your presence
Shooting sparks and fire, just like your eyes
You caught them in your hands and threw them to the midnight sky
Laughing like you had found wild love
While your lion eyes claimed me as yours, or so I thought
But our love was no feast…
We were scavengers in the garden
And soon our bones were brittle –
Hunger fueling madness and disordered molecules; Vertigo aberrations
You cut the smile from my face with your rusted razorblades
And the sky fell down, spinning all the stars in reverse rhythm… to erase us…
Our brutal death too painful for the wretched worried –
Those weeping angels by the gate, holding the worlds last hope in their gentle hands
Praying for a soft place to land, to cool the raging bitterness that defined something beautiful
Wrecked it with such callousness
Our three fates failed destiny
Magic moon in full eclipse, obscured what was and should have been
You won’t believe what you can’t see
Behind the glass of shattered mirrors, your rusted eyes a gristled graveyard –
Cauterized; Dead to shadows luring ghosts
Aborted love, this midnight sky hemorrhaging infant dreams, beneath a paraphed heaven
We were an amphigory, an extensive misnomer
Too late for us, your embittered soul plumed with insanity; Stiletto rage stabbing 13 layers deep…
Slicing at your fevered eyes beneath a trembling moon and withered sky
All consuming pain disintegrating eternity; You stood there and watched heaven burn –
Even though you couldn’t see…
And my tears rained down a torrent, my tears became my words
My tears became your absinthe; You drank until you slurred –
Flames chewing up the sky, like your serrated machete teeth that left lovers hickeys on my thighs
Licking up the blood, you smiled, and cut me again
Graphite veins, honeyed blood, puncture wounds, contemptible, damnable sighs
That shook the stars from their beds
Turned the moon from pale to red
I kissed my words into the sky
I kissed my love for you goodbye

Love Letter

If I was dying
Taking my last breath
Exhaling my life, then sucking it deep into my lungs for the last time
I’d like my eyes to paint your face onto heaven
A sight too beautiful to leave behind –
Those haunting eyes, piercing multifaceted visions, wildfire desires, spurned ghosts, tortured demons
Those eyes, hungry for every curve of my nakedness, unbound straitjackets, salivating with savage lust –
Drunk on my haphazard scars, reckless superstitious worship of my blind curves, libidinous demented frenzy
Arrogant gazes torching tender skin, unspoken, smoldering
If I was dying
I’d write our story; A love story via lonely, dejected poems
A tragic epic, melancholy, brokenhearted, meant-to-be
We had no chance, from the beginning
I was just your sacrifice, so you could find your remedy
You’ve never noticed my tears bleeding, heartless pain mutilating my soul
But I know there’s beauty in sorrow –
You know what they say… There’s no place like home
If I was dying
I’d wish you’d kiss me
Like I was everything that you needed to know
All of your answers, all of your mysteries; The total reckoning and recognition, of your soul
I wish you’d kiss me like I was your madness, your moonlight falling, your naked demons twisting time
The wilted flower upon your tombstone, the blood in your veins, your every tragic, last goodbye

I wish that I was your favorite fantasy, your greatest mystery, your anguished tears
I wish that I was your souls calling, the one you’ve died for these last thousand years

I wish that we, were a story
But there’s no story with empty words
No chance, from the beginning –
We had no meaning, just the absurd…
Sometimes there are more questions than answers –
I wish I knew if I was someone that you really loved
The next time, maybe you’ll tell me
And we’ll finally have our beginning –
Despite our ending

Before we’re blown away like sandy dirt and tumbleweeds in a Northwest windstorm –
Lost to the vastness of a timeless universe

And we forget
Who we were together –

That we ever existed in each others light and shadows…

A ghost moon searching for our memory
Among the dying stars

Ripping

If you could pour inside
My confused mind
Lend your beauty to my sorrows
Scrape the rust from the bone and blood
Leave me your answers, wrapped in holy cloth
Feed me my pain like sweet honey
Melt it all down –
This ripping… ripping away from you…
So I can’t tell, where your skin leaves mine –
Where our spirits pull the sutures and fall away
Down into the rabbit hole where above is below
Where you cry when you smile
And your eyes kill the lovely –
Stab its wings with a thousand cuts
Until it falls from paradise, crashing through the mirror
Impaled by your deafening, profane pain
If you could pour inside
My mangled heart
Capture my dying with your sweetness
Take it to the river and weigh it down with stones
To calm this desolation, like your hands do when I’m weary
Pressed against my temple or resting where its heavy; Each wounding burden…
Come let me stitch your wings
Let me smooth those bent feathers
So you can soar above the wreckage…
Look down on heaven with those lion eyes
Fierce and soft with fire and redemption
While the moon whispers for the wind until it finds its song –
The lyrics you left for the mountain dancers
To chant in prayer during their fire Mourning
While they wail and moan, shudder and shake, gouge their eyes, slice their skin
Their sorrowful laments breathing life into death
Moving demons to cry… to write your name on their tears
Moving angels to abandon mercy… set fire to the flowers and hammer to the stones
But this desecration… this moratorium… this… angels tribulation –
This abyss of irreverence is just a shadow in the moons eye, a window with shredded curtains
Revealing that your ephemeral existence
Is carved into the mountains, carried on the wind, flowing through the rivers, feeding the fire
Come let me stitch your wings
Let me smooth those bent feathers
Kiss your candied mouth before your journey –
Let you leave your taste on me
Oh but wait… that’s just a dream within this nightmare
Where the weeds have crept too high
Smothered the moons luminous caress
Stripped your soul until it felt devoid of the Springtime
In the Winter of your pathos
Ripping you away from yourself –
Ripping you away from me