Something a bit different III

Loves Ballet (2002)

At Prides insistence
I whispered –
In the distance
You’ll find yourself returning
And bit my lip until it bled to halt tears that were burning
Gauzy love was blowing in the air
While children ran round a fish-shaped fountain
And up red mossy stairs…
And through my skirt the coldness of the wall
Was nothing like the sorrow of the flight of love, now stalled
As if they sensed this tete-a-tete was of regret
The leaves blew from the trees
Floating down and swirling round it seemed in ecstasy
And I
I longed to touch your face
My soul
Reeled from neglect and begged for one more taste
But while your eyes were lit lamps of concern
The flames I used to see for me were now a fire that barely burned
And at guilts insistence
You said, in the distance
You might find the fog was clearing…
But that you’d spurned Cupids pomp –
Yet it seemed your eyes were tearing…
And the heaviness within my heart lurched against my chest
But I remembered vividly you said you thought it best
And I could try a harlots tricks, but stubborn as you were
Painted lips and flirty eyes to you’d just be obscure…
I turned my face against an ill cold wind
I stood and one last look at you about did me in
But love is not, my love, always lovely
And sometimes the truth does truly set you free
It might take time but I knew I’d find some tranquility
And why should I beg anyone to stay who wished to leave?
So then, a smile and one last look
In deep, dark liquid eyes
Funny how we used to share our bodies every night…
And now it seemed the frozen ground held an imaginary line –
I dared not pass or even smudge
As I said goodbye…
The children were still playing round the fountain as I walked away
They snatched a plump orange goldfish but it made a grand escape
I turned around and you were gone, and I wondered if you felt the same –
Or if, like me, you were sad to see
The death of loves ballet